Ripe for the picking.

He rose from His bed, stomach rumbling, and wiped the sleep from His eyes. He craved mango, but detested the idea of heading to the store, groaning internally at the thought throwing on a fresh robe.


On His way to check His fruit bowl, He walked past the solar system and doubled back– something had caught his eye. Before His nap, God vaguely recalled smashing the earth with an asteroid; the organics had gotten out of control and he decided to sterilize. But now, curiously, shiny bits of debris littered the space around earth.


“The hell?” God muttered, hunching over to eye level with the earth. He wiped at His eyes again. “Nope. Still there.”


“Gabriel?! Can you come in here? Please.” God said eyeing the dead planet.


“Sir?” Gabriel said, floating out of an overhead cloud.


“What’s all this?” God said waving a hand at the solar system.


Gabriel squinted. “What, uh, what do you mean sir? Earth?”


God crossed his arms. “Uh, yeah. I thought I killed this thing.”


Gabriel floated over the suspended planet, sniffed, and recoiled. “Nope,” he coughed. “Life is, uh, persistent my Lord.” He smiled. “This one is particularly ripe for the picking.”


God leaned forward and inhaled. “Oh fuck, yeah this’s gotta go.” He turned, rubbing his still-grumbling stomach. “Blow it up.”


Gabriel nodded. “Right away sir.”


God heard a pop from the other room and walked back to a haze of ash. He arched an eyebrow at Gabriel.


“Volcano, sir.”


Mouthful of mango, God gave the thumbs up and headed back to his favorite sleeping cloud.


Prompt: Long ago, God gave up on his creation, smashing a giant asteroid into the earth in order to destroy all life. 66 million years later, he has returned.


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